Say again?

Dude: Are you open?
Me: No, unfortunately we're closed for installation until the 26th. But you can still visit the shop or the garden.
Dude: *leans over my desk with a manic grin* Well then ya'll what you are whatcha' and whatcha' are then so what yeah?
Me:...*blinks*... *stares*
Dude: *Stares*
Me:...Sure?
Dude: Yeah! *Smiles and walks into the shop*

....Did i just have a stroke?

x

He Needs to see that painting, guys.

Douche Canoe: *blows through the front doors and past me into the galleries, holding a cup of copy*

Me: Hello. How can I help you?

DC: *Completely ignores me and keeps walking*

Me: *loudly* Excuse me, How can I help you?

DC: I wanna see that painting!

Me: You have to pay admission to see the galleries.

DC: I just want to see that painting!

Me: I'm sorry but you need to buy a ticket. And you'll have to leave your coffee here too. 

DC: I don't want your list of rules! I want to see the painting!

Me: Then you have to buy a ticket. 

DC: I didn't come here to be lectured! *He grabs his forehead* I'm just leaving! I can't be here with someone like YOU anymore! You'll here from me on YELP! *storms out*

Me: ...Have a good day!

You're Not Fooling Anyone.

Her: So 25 and under get in for free?

Me: Yes, with an ID like a driver's licence or passport.

Her: *stares. Then whispers to her friends. Then turns back to me*  We don't REALLY need an ID if we're REALLY 25 and under, right? I mean that's just to scare the old people.

Me:... Yeah. You do.

Her: *stares* But we're kids so we don't have IDs.

Me: How old are you?

Her: We're all 21.

Me: ...You need an ID.

Her: Lame. *They all flounce away in a cloud of pissy*

AND scene.